Define: dreams

On September 8, 2001, I made a list of dreams.

1. Be a doctor

2. Be a barrio doctor at least for a year, preferrably in Batanes

3. Write a script/screenplay and see it shown

4. Live in extreme cold for at least a month

5. Write/publish a book

6. Have a restaurant/food business

7. Go around the world/visit the tiangges around the world/go around the Philippines for a year

8. Live in NY for at least a month

9. Fall in love

10. Singapore

 

At an unknown time later, I amended these.

1. Write a book

2. Make a movie

3. Go around the Philippines for a year and join events

4. Be a photographer

5. Sew my own clothes

6. Visit Batanes

 

I want you to know, my dear, that dreams can be amended. When you're older and you can understand movie storylines, we will see Pixar's "Up" for you to see what I mean. Dreams can be amended, and when you do amend them, it doesn't always mean you're giving up on your dreams. It can mean that you've become a different person, and you're comfortable with where you are. You'll hear a lot of people telling you to get out of your comfort zone. I agree with that. However, I once heard a speaker, Chot Reyes, coach of the Gilas Pilipinas, a national basketball team who went on to compete in the big leagues of international basketball some years back, talk about the "gift zone". You have to be mindful of the difference between your comfort zone and your gift zone. Comfort zone is when you have gotten used to doing things a certain way, and are no longer interested nor courageous enough to try new things. Gift zone is when you have found what makes you trully happy, whether it's a relationship, a profession or a hobby, and you're contented with where you are. The difference lies in your emotional state, happy and contentment being key.

Define: 2013

I don’t remember much what I was doing this time last year. I have vague memories of preparing for a friend's wedding, working on Christmas projects for the office, and assisting a pregnant friend in her gift shopping.

Remembering 2013 is going to be a different story. I am positive that one, five, even ten years from now, I will remember what I was doing this year. It's not every year that you get married. It's not every year that you get pregnant. Certainly not every year that a child is welcomed in your family.

I stood alone around midnight at the entrance of Rockwell, waiting for Ken to pick me up. Because of the lateness of the time, there were no people waiting with me, nor anyone walking by. I looked around and realized…it will be a long while before I experience this aloneness again. Not months, not years, but decades.

How does one's life change so drastically in a span of 12 months? A year ago, I had full control of my body, my future, and my every move. Today, my bladder feels like it's generating water on its own, my lower back aches where it never ached before, and my eyesight is at its worst. The control I had a year ago was something I couldn’t even remember anymore.

The fatigue is something different all together. I have had tired, exhausting episodes before, like maybe after working for almost 16 hours or more, or after a 12-hour bus ride that's bumpy. These days though, I wake up to pee, and I'm already tired. I stand up to get water, and then I'm tired. The only thing pushing me to move is my need to eat so that the little one doesn’t miss out on meals. Otherwise, I think I would be content simply sleeping 24 hours a day.

And then there's my walking. I love walking, and I love walking fast, I feel like I'm bouncing. Occasionally, I would sprint to my destination and the surge of energy is always liberating. And yet, I suddenly find myself unable to walk with the same speed. Instead, I wobble along. When, and how, did that happen?

And yet, in the wee hours of the morning, in the middle of my sleep, I would be awakened by a gentle kick or a little squirm, as if a little body is also shifting sleeping positions inside of me. That's when I wonder, how indeed did I get so lucky as to have deserved a special gift? Sure, the little joints kneading my insides sometimes feel like my stomach is about to launch an alien, but how could you not adore the little movements that indicate the signs of precious life?

In two to three weeks, (or maybe even a week, who knows?), I will be in labor, in a hospital room, and then life would never be the same, our little angel will be born. I've heard stories of how sleep will soon be a luxury to me. How pregnancy is really just the beginning and that it doesn’t compare to the years of early mornings and late nights ahead. I have heard horror stories of labor, and I can absolutely say without shame nor embarrassment right now that I am terrified. I am unprepared. I do not know what to do.  I am sure I will cry in the process. Or maybe ask for even just a slight delay until I can gain control, even when I know control is no longer possible.

One thing is for sure though, I have never felt happiness that can top my 2013, and I know that the coming years of losing control will also bring along even more of this kind of joy. That's why I am sure I will remember decades from now what I was doing in 2013 - it was the year I stopped walking fast, and instead, wobbled along.

 

Define: parasailing

On my first Valentines Day in Singapore, I was amazed to see how big of a holiday it was in the small city. I took the train and everyone around me were carrying bouquets of flowers. I arrive at work, and the ladies are either waiting for a flower delivery (and sighing a little when the delivery that arrived wasn't for them), while the men are struggling to find flower shops who would deliver last minute orders without charging obscenely. In the evening, the restaurants were incredibly packed, getting a cab was near impossible, and people were just...everywhere.
 
Years later, I go home to Manila to find that the intense celebration of Valentines Day has landed. Not a single public place is without decorations. At work, various activities are taking place, small and big. We have balloons, games, even little notecards you can write on and have someone deliver for you. People were exchanging gifts and arranging dinners and night outs. It reminded me of one other holiday when all this madness happens. Is it Christmas that day?

What struck me the most is that these people participating in the events and getting hung up on Valentines are not couples. These are friends saying "hi's" to other friends. These are buddies sending a funny joke to another. These are employees sending a "thank you" to their boss. These are bosses sending a "good job" to their team. These are children sending flowers to their mothers.

What used to be an event for couples only, have become an event for all. A holiday that used to remind of romance, now celebrates love. I don't celebrate Valentines Day, but this year, I wondered, why not?

Valentines Day is a reminder for us to express love. In our fast-paced life of technology, work and social networking, it can be easy to forget. If you have been badly hurt by a previous relationship, or have long been searching for someone to be with, and couldn't seem to meet anyone "right", it can be easy to forget. The problem with forgetting is that you not only forget to express love, you forget the feeling of how it is be given love as well. And somewhere along the way, you lose the courage to continue searching for it, and just believe that it's not something you deserve, or make yourself believe it's not something you want. You may forget that there are people around you who do love you as much as any boyfriend or girlfriend would. Sure, you don't go out on dates, there are no romantic kisses, but you are there for each other. Having people around you who care for you is the best reminder that love will be there.

A while back, while waiting for my turn to go parasailing, a friend asked if I was sure I wanted to do it, wouldn't I get seasick and end up vomitting? I did get seasick, and I did vomit after the ride. Did I enjoy parasailing? Definitely, it was the closest I was to flying. Valentines Day reminds us that love, as that wonderful movie says, is all around. And that even if you're hurt, or lonely, scared and hopeless that you'll ever find it, you should still go on. You may end up vomitting, but the feeling of giving love, and being loved, is the closest we have to flying.

Happy Valentines Day to all, and to all, a good night!

Define: words

A wedding and a marriage are two different things. One stands for the ceremony, the other, for the commitment. One stands for the party, the other, for the life. One stands for the event everyone is eager to attend, the other, for the situation everyone is eager to meddle with.

In a society that have commercialized weddings into an industry, I often see weddings as a means to throw a party. We are not celebrities nor socialites, who can host annual birthday bashes that will have photography sessions or videos. We are simple people, and weddings become a way of putting together an event where we are king and queen for one day. Where all of our movement, our smiles, our laughter, even the way we put on our shoes, are pieced together in an AVP with a romantic love song for a soundtrack after. How else can you use A Thousand Years as a soundtrack to your normal day-to-day life, without being Bella or Edward?

On Dec. 8, 2012, I know four people who tied the knot with their respective partners. For one, I stood in as a maid of honor, and I thank my dear friend, for allowing me that. It has restored for me the sanctity of the ceremony, and has made me realize why people choose to be 'wed' when they get married.

It started with the night before, as I give up a night of party and beers with other friends, for a night of simple Cinema One pleasure with the bride. We talk about the wedding, family life, other stuff that are nonsense, and everything in between, until she and I fell asleep.

The day of the wedding, we are a bit unsure as to what to do. There are errands, phone calls, people to coordinate. There is a bit of drama here and there as some things don't happen the way we expect them to, but I keep telling myself, don't sweat the small stuff, this will be over soon.

The bride joined me and our other friend standing in as a bridesmaid, in the bathroom, to share a bit of breathing space. There is so much happening outside the bathroom as the entourage prepares, the photographers take photos of the accessories and dress, and congratulatory videos are taken. At that moment, I see the pressure and anticipation in her eyes, and I tell myself, it's time to step it up. It is not about waiting for this to be over soon. It is about making it happen just the way she wants it to.

As I walk here and there to make sure everyone is lined up, the guests are seated where they should be, and the right song is playing, I feel a surge of energy. I used to tell this same friend, every girl needs a friend who will slap her on the face when the friend thinks she's being delusional. And now, every girl needs a friend who will yell, pressure and challenge everyone to ensure the wedding of her dreams happen the exact way she planned it to be.

The wedding coordinator cues to me that all is set, and we can start the march down the aisle. I tell her to stop, there is only one thing that will signify we can start. I turn to the groom and ask him if he's ready, this is the moment. And we stand there for a minute that felt longer, as he hyperventilates a little, and, I can imagine, realizes all this will only be set in motion if and only if, both of them are ready, in more ways than one. He gives me a yes and a smile, and in the same breath, he walks down the aisle.

I eventually get my turn to walk, and while I do so, I smile and I look around - it's a great wedding. As I reach my seat, I turn back and look at the bride. A Thousand Years begin singing into the background, and I think when she took her first step on the aisle with her mom and dad, all of us looking have one collective thought. Perfect. The song is perfect, the dress is perfect, the aisle, the seats, even the breeze at the time is just right.

It is that moment that I realize why people choose to get 'wed' when they get married. A wedding is where your family, and everyone else who know you, come together to give you away to another family. It is a time where your parents and siblings and best friends take it in their hearts that it is no longer just them who are in your life now. It's a means to help the people around you accept and welcome this new person in their own lives. It is how you tell the people around you that you are happy, and that this is your choice, and that you wish they will all be happy for you.

On my turn to give a speech, there are so many things I plan to say, both funny and sad, witty and profound. But everything that needs to be said has been said, and I felt I couldn't give justice to the joy that was in the air that night. I love writing. I love words. But that day, I came to understand the true meaning of a few words I throw around so carelessly - and so chose to be speechless.

I walked away after the reception, and didn't join any afterparties that night, neither with friends, nor with the happy couple. I chose to stay with Ken, under the brightly lit stars, lying down on the beach, with a mango shake and a hotdog.

Congratulations to our bestest friend, Toni, and to our new friend, Carlo. There are no words to describe the joy we feel for you :)

Define: walking

  

My current wallpaper, Calle Crisologo in Vigan, Ilocos Sur



The selling point of the Windows phones is networking. It makes it easy for you to log in to your Facebook, Windows Live, Linkedin and Google accounts. As soon as you load your contacts, the phone finds common names across your various accounts and links them all, and it does so intelligently. Once your Facebook is logged in, it even takes your Facebook albums and loads them into the phone. All of a sudden, your whole online life is connected through one small gadget. When it was still new, my Android tablet was left untouched for five, whole days, and I only actually logged onto my computer for work. All my other online needs, including games, went through the Windows phone. It is on this week that I rediscovered the old photo albums on my Facebook account, and for some time now, I've been interchanging my phone's wall paper to show my most favorite pictures of the few travels that I have done.

It's been a while now since I have explored a new place, the last time I did that was in Vigan in January of 2011. After that, my trips had been to places that I have gone to before, and mostly just to spend time with friends and relax from work. Next week, I embark once again on a trip to see something new, Siem Reap in Cambodia. It is a trip that my closest friends and I have been planning to make ever since we saw the first Lara Croft movie, there just never was an opportunity to go, or a cheap plane ticket to buy, until this year, when Cebupacific finally got approval to fly there straight from the Philippines.


Bah Kuh Teh, Noodles & Teh Tariks in KL


What I am most excited about is the food. Even as I write, I feel my mouth salivate a little at the thought of what street food I get to sample once we land. When Ken and I go on trips, food is always a major itinerary item, guided by a simple rule: no McDonald's. It was a rule we came up with on our trip to Malaysia in 2009, no taxi rides, no McDonald's.

Three years later, we still abide by this rule. As much as we can, when in a new place, we go around by local transportation, and eat local food. We steer away from taking the taxi because it robs us of the sweet time we can spend walking around and getting lost in the new environment. In a new place, is getting lost any different from knowing your way? It is with vigor and sunshiny enthusiasm that we weave through each town, armed with any map we can obtain from either the tourist centers, or from his iPhone, all mostly on foot, occasionally by train and bus. We stare curiously at food sold on the streets, oftentimes observing first how the passersby buy and eat them, before trying them out ourselves.

Murtabak with Teh-O-Pengs (Iced Tea)

One of my most memorable moments of getting lost and discovering great food is in the place I called home once, Singapore. Ken was there for a visit, and per his usual trip, we were out one afternoon, just walking around until we get somewhere. On that day, I couldn't really remember if we planned on going to Arab Street, but that's where we ended up. Looking for an afternoon snack, I brought Ken to a "murtabak" place. I can't remember now, but it might have been a place a Singaporean friend recommended. Murtabak is essentially a crepe with meat filling, served with curry. The place boasts to have been making murtabak for almost 70 years. We watched how the expert cook made murtabak by smoothing an elastic dough on a flat pan, and assembling the fillings. To this day, we always laugh at how he cracked an egg right into the middle of the dough and spread the gooey contents with his hand nonchalantly. Anywhere else, this would have been taken as wrong cooking practice, spoons are made for this task. There, it was a treat to see that your food is made by experts who don't care about cooking show techniques. They use tried and tested skill.

I have never been to Europe, have only been to the US once, and have never set foot in big theme parks like Universal Studios, or Disney. I have never done hard-core mountain climbing, nor have jetski-ed, bunjee jumped, scuba-dived, nor gone white-water rafting. My passport does not boast stamp after stamp of immigration offices from different cities. Yet when asked if I consider myself an experienced traveler, I always answer yes, even if the only stories I can tell are recycled and limited, all of the same places that a lot of people have already been to. I think what makes my stories special is that each experience is unique, in that not many would have tried getting lost the way we did. Not many would have ate the way we did. I am no Andrew Zimmern, eating exotic foods from different places, but I'm happy to share that my palate has now been trained to recognize flavors, texture and aroma, and categorize them according to the nearest type of cuisine they resemble. I'm happy to share that each time I'm in a new destination, I am able to walk to and fro places easily because I have somehow memorized my own landmarks for the place, enough to get lost with a mission. I consider myself an experienced traveler because that is what I do. I experience.
 

When you meet someone who can walk as briskly, and as endlessly as you can, stick with that one. You know he's never going to get tired, nor tiring.

Define: damage

For a whole 48 hours, the first level of our house is submerged in waist-deep flood water. Much of our common household items swam and floated, while we camp out in our small room. Today, the rain finally stopped, and the flood water finally subsided. We began sweeping and checking what damages have happened.

Some of my clothes, a few bedsheets that I bought from Singapore, a lot of CDs and kitchen items were wasted. The washing machine was floating. It will be a few days before I can actually plug it in and do anything useful with it. The fridge almost floated, thank goodness it didn't.

Out of all the things that I've had to clean up or throw away, the one thing that disappointed was a pack of Chips-A-Hoy cookies in the fridge. When we defrosted the fridge, the freezer water seeped down to the rest of the food that's on the lower levels, including my cookies. They were soaked with freezer water through and through.

As soon as I saw the soaked cookies, I felt an incredible sadness over it.

A few hours of cleaning later, I felt relieved and glad. Out of all the things that got soaked in the water and rendered unusable, the one thing I was disappointed over was a bag of cookies that I can replace easily from the grocery. I wasn't sad about the soaked clothes, or the imported bed sheets. Not about the prized office papers of old workshop materials.

Either we didn't have a lot of damage, or I can finally tell the real things that matter from the ones that don't.

Define: growing up

Things I eat now but didn't eat when I was a kid:

Squid - My older brother loved "adobong pusit", squid cooked in its own ink with soy sauce and garlic. My grandmother would cook it all the time, but she would cook me something else because I do not eat it. One day in high school or college, I tasted it, and to this day it's one of the dishes that get my mouth watering when I see it in cafeteria selections.

Okra (ladyfingers) - As a child, I was not trained to eat vegetables. My grandparents I guess wanted to be spared from the hassle of training a child to eat greens, so we always had kid-friendly food instead - pork chops, chicken, hotdogs. We would see vegetables on the table, but those had always been for grown-ups. I do not remember the day, neither the dish, but just like the squid, one day, I picked up a cooked okra, and now keep some in stock for steaming so I can eat it with almost anything.

Liver - I guess when you're a kid, a lot of things are just not familiar to you. We not only don't want to spend time with something unfamiliar, we don't want to eat it! And so when the grown-ups told me that what's in that menudo is chicken liver, I reject it. These days, I pick these tiny cubes from menudo and eat them with the potatoes and carrots each time.

Dinuguan - Dinuguan, or pork parts cooked in pig's blood, will definitely sound yucky in any language. Imagine what a child would think upon hearing that she's about to be fed blood. We never cook dinuguan in our household back when my grandmother headed the kitchen. Some time back, my mom took over the cooking and she cooked dinuguan. At first taste, it became one of my automatically favorite dish.

Some things never change:

Inihaw na bangus - I left our family home to live alone when I was 26 years. I lived in Singapore for about 3 years, and when I came back to the Philippines, lived with my long time partner. Since 2006, the time I spend at our family home are more of weekend visits. I never declared grilled milkfish or "bangus" my favorite dish. In fact, when asked what my favorite food is, I often answer spaghetti. But I guess my mom and dad knew better - because ever since I left home, there will always be, always, grilled milkfish on each and every visit. And in the few times there wasn't, my mom would replace it with my other favorite dish, one that I have declared, pork pochero.

Bone marrow - People all over the world love bone marrow. There's something about that gooey, rich fat that you suck out of the bone that makes people's mouth water. Or so they say. I have never eaten bone marrow, and despite the many trips to Tagaytay where the bone marrow is famously cooked in a heartwarming soup that I love, I will never eat bone marrow. As a child, I didn't eat it because it looks weird. As an adult, I won't eat it because I know it will taste good. I don't want to eat it and like it, because I know it's bad cholesterol, plain and simple.

Bagoong - From the day my mom introduced me to diced tomatoes with bagoong as a young child, to this day, bagoong has always been a staple in any fridge I have. In Singapore, I have had to wrap my bagoong jar in layers of newspaper and plastic so it doesn't get detected in the airport. In Makati, I always keep a small container, and get my fill whenever I go home to Tondo. Bagoong is my all-around flavoring - it goes well with my rice, my fish, my tomatoes and my okra.

Fresh tomatoes - I have met some people who don't eat tomatoes, and I find it incredibly bothersome. I don't know how they survive. As a kid, I grew up surrounded by tomatoes. Our home in Tondo is in the middle of the marketplace, and the area I live in especially is the place where tomato storage warehouses are found. Crates and boxes of tomatoes surround me, how can I not grow up liking it? When I cook spaghetti, I put about 5-6 big ones in. When I eat anything fried or grilled, I don't feel complete without it. And between the choice of white sauce or red sauce in pasta when eating out, I often get puzzled why people choose white.

Define: time-out

In nostalgic moments in movies or books or any other romantic media, we always hear or see the phrase "this can change your life". Now that I am working with people, I realize that there really are moments that can change a person's life. One tiny decision that someone else makes for them, can spell the difference between success and failure in the future.

Therefore, if you are tasked to lead a team or work with people, remember these words: this can change some one's life.  Take the context of corrective action memos. Oftentimes, we issue them to team members who, in a nutshell, have screwed up. However, it's important to realize that while for us, it may be just another company protocol we need to follow, for the person, it is an important, singular learning event.

One of the things I haven't done in my life before 2011 is issue corrective action memos to people. I had always been an individual contributor, and never had to coach, motivate nor penalize anyone in my teams at work. I had feared that the confrontation involved in these kinds of interactions can be intense and pressurizing. That I have to be on edge and alert to attack on these moments.

When I remembered that a few years back, these people were me, all of a sudden, coaching became easy. I tried to think back to the times when I would screw up at work and get very anxious at what sermon the boss is going to give me, and think back to how my superiors then handled the situation. Some did well, others didn't. Those who didn't do well, I can't remember anymore. I don't even remember what the screw-up was. Those who did well, I remember like they just happened yesterday. I remember what I did wrong. I remember what I was told. I remember how I improved after.

So what do we do then? Simple, take the time to put yourself in the person's shoes. Reflect on how this person is feeling now, what he/she is thinking, where he/she is coming from. More often that not, simply putting yourself in their situation for a second can remind you that you probably were in that position once, and that, consequently, will remind you of how you felt at the time. Were you embarrassed? Did you feel ashamed? Were you smug and thought you didn't do anything wrong? Were you assertive?

More importantly, you will remember how you felt about the person who gave you the coaching for it, and the corresponding memo. You would remember if you shrugged off the incident afterward because you didn't like your supervisor. Or if you cried afterwards for being yelled at or humiliated. Or if you quit out of anger.

Think of these situations as critical learning events. By the terminologies themselves, you are supposed to provide "corrective action", meaning after you have served the memo, you would expect corrected behaviour in the future to come. And for correct behaviour to happen, a person needs to learn from the experience. He/she needs to understand where the gap was, and what needs to be done to cross it.

Realizing it from this perspective has made coaching easier for me. Instead of viewing it as a session to point out mistakes, I now view it as a session to impose a time-out, a break in the system for both myself and the person, for us to think together about the screw up that happened. What I often find is that I too learn from the session always in so many ways, and it has now become a pleasant experience for me.

Of course, learning doesn't happen overnight, and that's the real reason we have "prescriptive (or -ion?) periods" for these corrective action memos. Well, OK, these roll-off/prescriptive periods are also for the benefit of tracking, so we all have a timeline of events. What we usually fail to remember though is that it's not always a prescriptive period for a corrective action to end its effectivity. In the context of learning, it's the period you're providing the person to "learn" from this mistake and prove that learning happened by demonstrating corrected behavior.

Throughout the prescriptive period, the person is going to stumble along the way, miss a few items here and there. But remember that these are all part of the learning process. We need to constantly remind the person to get on track, and tell them if they're doing a good or bad job. Even more important, we need to assure the person that their learning is important. That they are within a safe environment wherein even though we are monitoring for hits and misses as their supervisor, we are not judging them internally as human beings.

In the craziness of the daily grind, we often forget that at the end of the day, we are all the same person - someone trying to earn a living so we can go on with life. Sometimes, we get sucked into the daily motions of emails and meetings, that working with people become the last agenda in our minds, and we resort into tick-marking the items we need to do: have I conducted a 1-1? Yes. Did I document and serve a memo? Yes. Did I submit to HR? Yes. Did the person leave before I can hire a replacement? No. And afterwards think that our work in that event is done.

If it were all that easy and automatic, leading people would've been handed over to machines and computer programs. But it's not that easy. Because the tick mark that you squeezed into your busy calendar can change the course of someone else's life.

I opened my iGoogle account to get to my shortcut for my school's website, and got digressed instead to reading the Tumbleblog. Reading 'The One with the Online Dating Game' inspired me to take a few minutes to reflect and write, and maybe change some one's life. Thanks, Megzy, for always keeping me focused on what matter most :)

Define: costumes

I had a boss once who told us, "inefficient people cannot pretend forever." This was in relation to someone supervising our team then, and didn't do a very motivating job of it. He would make us go on overtimes without clearly identifying what we needed to do. He would ask us to go to work over the weekends, and we find ourselves sitting with no workload. He would yell at people in the room to the point that some ended up crying on the spot with the shame and humiliation. He would accuse some co-workers of conspiracy and confront them as to "what they're up to". In a nutshell, he was terrible.

After a while, the horrible superior did leave. And so, I held on to that statement the higher boss made, to the point of it being a sort of mantra for me. Whenever I encounter difficult situations brought on by difficult people, I say, "inefficient people cannot pretend forever."

At some point though, you meet different people, and you see a wider view of the world, and you realize, aren't we all in reality, inefficient? A friend of mine likes to use the Peter Principle - you are only promoted to your highest level of incompetency. So, really, all of us are inefficient at some point. All of us reach a stage when we can't pretend anymore.

At which point, we start to actually do the job we should have been doing. We stop pretending to be the "face" of the job we thought we should project. Once we reach the point when we can't pretend anymore, we start thinking, "well, I've done all the things the self-help books, and management modules and MBAs taught me to do, and they don't seem to work." So we bring in ourselves, costumes and perceptions shed off, the self who got hired to do the job in the first place.

So, while that statement is still true to me - inefficient people cannot pretend forever - I don't render it applicable now to just the "difficult" people whom I think make life frustrating. It's a statement that applies to me now. With any given new task, project or job, I have to make sure that my "pretend" phase is short, because that's the phase I'm most inefficient. I'm too busy looking the part, I have little time to actually act the part.

Define: cheerleader

Just a year back, I shudder at the idea of people management. I know myself and I know that it's not my strength. No, I haven't actually tried it full time before, but with all the projects I've handled, taking care of the people involved, motivating them, disciplining them and all that, is just the hardest aspect.

Sooner or later though, everyone needs to go through a "growing up" period. I can't be an individual contributor forever. As I age and take on bigger, decision-making roles in the workplace, I need to work with people and guide them to reach their potential. Sometimes, it includes listening to all their blow-by-blow accounts of how their day went. Sometimes, it means prodding and prying until they open up and help me understand the real challenges they face.

A boss said a few weeks back that a people manager's job is about cheering team members on. I have pictures in my head of myself walking through the office aisles with pom-poms and streamers, yelling "you go!" While it looks fun, in real life, it's exhausting, and I think the reason why that is, is because to be able to cheer someone on, you build up these happy, positive thoughts in you, and transfer them on to someone. With each employee you cheer on, you are a few ounces of positivism less within your own supply. Unfortunately, there's no Gatorade or energy drink you can drink to replenish your own happy, positive thoughts immediately. The only way to replenish them is either by getting them from someone else (i.e. be cheered on yourself), or rest for a while and recover. All these combined - exhausting.

Yesterday, I walked into a room of hopeful individuals in our company who were taking an exam needed for them to be promoted. When I opened the door, all 5 fresh, young faces looked up in a mixture of panic and effort to appear composed.

Here are the people I work for. Here are the reasons why I do what I do. I am no longer young, no longer a part of the twenty-something bunch boasting of high potential. In people management, I am now part of the bigger world whose responsibility is find and develop those twenty-something bunch so they reach their potential. In essence, I need to ensure that these 5 people, and all others like them stay focused on that exam, stay focused on their goals, and more importantly, find those goals early in their career life. For that brief 10 seconds, looking at all those faces, I felt replenished with a whole month's, maybe year's worth, of positivism.

With that, I go back, pick up my pom-poms and do a somersault. Figuratively. I never learned how to perform one.

Define: free gift

I got a very belated Christmas gift of a laptop bag a week back. Since we paid by credit card, we got a scratch card from Citibank that revealed a fabulous prize - a pen set!

Anything free is great, so we hopped off to the redemption booth to claim our prize. Two ladies were already waiting at the booth for their pen sets as well. Unfortunately, the booth was out of pen sets, they only had a delivery of the school supplies set - a goodie bag of crayons, pencils and art materials.

The ladies started complaining on how inconvenient the whole process is - you go to the redemption booth, which is a floor above the scratch card booth. Then, upon getting there, you don't get the prize you were promised. What if the pen set is more expensive than the school supplies set? When will the pen set be available? This is an outrageous program you have! Buti pang di na kayo nagpa-promo!

After apologizing profusely to the two customers who left greatly dissatisfied with their new Crayolas, the redemption booth lady finally turned to assist me and immediately launched into pleading explanations because she can only provide me the school supplies set.

It's a fast-paced life we live in. Our generation is used to having everything we want quickly. With the freedom of the internet and quick-changing technology, we can easily search for alternatives if companies don't give us what we want. That means companies always have to be on their toes and be ready with stuff to lure us in. Hence, the free gift.

And I am all for the free gift.

Eventually though, we get into the habit of thinking we deserve so many things in life, up to the point when we refuse to reciprocate opportunities with hard work and diligence. When we start thinking that others owe us something, simply because we exist. We get into the attitude of ingratitude.

There are so many things in life that are much worse than being given a school supplies set instead of a pen set. We have to choose our battles, and reserve our energies to fight for the things that will matter in the greater scheme of life. Sometimes the inconvenience of a situation gets the better of us, and we start to complain for the sake of complaining. But really, what is wrong with a school supplies set?

Especially if you've just been out shopping for school supplies with your kid, who looks to be at the age when crayolas are the best thing on the planet.

Define: effortless

I didn't plan on going online this afternoon, and wanted to get enough sleep before work, but a friend texted about a tsunami alert. He doesn't have a TV at home, nor internet, so I went online and turned on the TV to check the news, and pass on what I see.

The news wasn't pretty at all.

And everywhere else in social networking-dom, news of the Japan earthquake and resulting tsunami are posted.

In between checking for new updates and texting people to be safe, I go over random people's profiles, old and new: old friends, new friends, past relationships, current relationships, close family, not-so-close family, and everyone else in between. The chaos outside is a reflection of the chaos within. In between status updates of the breaking news are updates of heartbreak, triumph, lost love, found love, lost hope, new hope, bad news and good news, and everything else in between.

While pictures don't represent real life, they capture moments. Even if in real life we're not smiling all the time, the pictures tell that for those moments captured by the lens, we are smiling and happy because of whatever little thing that that moment was about.

When you find people you're comfortable working with, you grab the opportunity to work with them more.

When you meet friends who are good to you and help you be better, you stay friends with them beyond geography, age or marital status.

When you are given a family to take care of, and who takes care of you, you protect them and look after them.

When you meet people who can make you smile and laugh, you talk to them often until you can't remember what you look like frowning.

When you cross paths with someone who loves you even when you're not at your spectacular best, you stay with that person and give each other strength.

Relationships are supposed to be simple and effortless. If what you're in now is not, leave. Your time is best spent with someone else. If what you're in now is, stay. Savor the moments that make this short and unpredictable life worthwhile.

Define: disappointment

You and your boyfriend are reaching that all-important first month anniversary. You both plan for a nice candlelit dinner, a walk in the park, and a movie after. You bought the movie tickets for the best seats and checked the park opening hours. All your boyfriend needs to do is to reserve a table for two.

The long-awaited night comes, but alas – the restaurant tells you that you do not have a table. You could wait an hour though, says the maître d’, which would mean you’ll miss the entire set of coming-soon-movie trailers they always show at the start of the film. You are livid with anger! You turn to your boyfriend and ask, “how could this happen? We called!” Your boyfriend then looks at you and starts with, “ah honey…”

Your instinct is to spend the next few hours pulling your hair and muttering could-have-beens under your breath, withering away in anger at your monthsary being sabotaged. But how angry should you be? Let’s find out. It all depends on how the boyfriend delivers his first reaction to this faux –pas:

• Reaction #1: “I’m so sorry, hon. This is all my fault. I was going to call them yesterday but got pulled into so many other things at work. How about getting a quick snack now, and then maybe they’ll have a table for us after the movie?” Would you be so angry at this explanation? I’m guessing not very much. He admitted it’s his fault, gave a reason as to why he didn’t call, and offered a possible solution. A quick snack at Mcdonalds does sound fine, right?
• Reaction #2: “Hmmm. I wasn’t able to call them. But let me talk to the maitre d’. Surely she can do something for us.” And then boyfriend walks off to talk to Madame maitre d’. You’d probably still be angry, he obviously forgot… and he didn’t even say that all important word – SORRY. But he’s going to do something. So until he can’t get you that table, simmer down for the meantime.
• Reaction #3: "Hmmm. I wasn’t able to call them. I wanted to though, I wrote a to-do in my planner.” And then boyfriend joins you and you both sulk on the side walk. Oh I’m sure you are angry by now. Not only was there no call AND no sorry, he didn’t even try calling in the first place! But he did want to. He said so himself. Maybe he just got pulled to save the world just when he was about to pick up the phone in the phonebooth. Always happens to Clark Kent.
• Reaction #4: “Hmmm. I wasn’t able to call them. I didn’t think I should have. They usually have so many tables available anyway.” And then boyfriend joins you on the side walk and gives you a paper heart he fashioned out of a gum wrapper. Now he tells you that! Right when the damage is already done??? Not only was there no call, no sorry, no effort, he never really intended to call the restaurant. BUT, he’s considering now the error of his ways and has given you this gem that deserves a place in that scrapbook you started the first time you went out.
• Reaction #5: "That was tonight? Oh well, McDonalds is just over there.” And boyfriend takes out his iPhone and starts the next level of Tap-Tap Revenge. I’m not even going to enumerate what was lacking in this reaction, there are sooo many. But let’s zero in on the number one thing that this reaction lacked - care. He simply didn’t seem like he cared. Not even a false, pretend-care, which the boyfriend who gave you the gum-wrapper-heart-origami at least showed. Clearly, he doesn’t see how much this evening meant to you. And even now, when you’re angry, he still can’t see it because Tap-Tap Revenge just used Katy Perry’s Firework in the next game.

It could be your boyfriend. Or girlfriend. It could be your mom, your son, your boss, your colleague. Lots of people have disappointed us, and lots of them are about to. It’s just how the world works. Sometimes, our disappointment reaches that stage of blind anger – you’re just angry at everyone and anyone, you just can’t remember anymore why. And most of the time, a huge chunk of our anger is not about the person not being able to deliver what you expect him or her to do. It’s because they didn’t seem to care. Their initial reaction to your disappointment is all wrong, and not at all what you wanted to hear.

So next time someone does not deliver according to expectations, and further disappoints you with his/her reaction, ask yourself:

• Did the person admit the mistake? If yes, get over it, move on.
•  If not, did the person try to do his/her part? If yes, get over it, move on.
• If not, did the person intend to do what you expected? If yes, get over it, move on.
• If not, did the person consider your feelings/the consequences/that possibly you’re right? If yes, get over it, move on.
• If not, did the person at least pretended to care? If yes, get over it, move on.

If not, then, by all means, be angry. Then get over it, move on.

While it’s normal to feel disappointment and anger, wallowing in it and thinking about it all day is usually counter-productive. I’d rather paint my toenails than think about the multitude of ways I can do things better if I were placed in the disappointing person’s shoes. Disappointment is a part of life. So as soon as you feel it, try to break the disappointment down right away until you find out what about the incident disappoints you the most. And then after that, wallow in anger accordingly, but never long enough to miss the next episode of your favorite TV show.

Disclaimer: Of course, I’m oversimplifying. If you’re going through something more traumatic like a real loss, a breakup, sickness, and all those life-altering experiences, getting over it is usually not as simple as this. But, you can still try J .

Special thanks to Meg, James and Ivan for formulating this 5-level disappointment test with me. Meg needs a Jaguar, by the way.

Define: love

(Warning: long post ahead. I love "love" after all lolol)

I know, I know. First happiness, now love. What's next? Crush? Most embarrassing moment?

Vigan, Ilocos Sur is a quaint city that boasts of culture, history and nostalgia. About some 2 years ago, I visited the town of Melaka in Malaysia, a place known for its history, old houses and heritage museums. Being in Vigan a few weeks ago brought (or as Finn of Glee says, brung) back memories of walking trips, invading other people's old houses and marvelling at the antiques they've amassed and kept intact through the years.

Before you do anything in Vigan, I suggest heading first to the Village Heritage Admin Office in Calle Crisologo. They give out free, unused maps of the city, and tips on kalesa and tricycle fares (P150/hr and P30-50/trip, respectively). They can also shuttle you free of charge using the city's e-jeepney, if you're heading to the River Cruise dock (P100/person). The office may only be open during office hours, though, I think. So, if you arrive wee in the morning, or super late night, depending on your bus schedule (check Partas Bus Transit), of course it's best to secure accommodations first. Try Grandpa's Inn. They have both types of accommodations: suites and air conditioned brick-walled rooms for the I-need-a-place-to-relax-in type of tourist, and simple fan rooms with common toilets and bath for the I-need-a-place-to-crash-in types. Our trip being uber-impromptu, and not very long, we opted for the latter. It was comfy, clean and just right for a simple, restful sleep.

Mode of transportation, aside from tricycles and private motorbikes

I liked Vigan for 2 things: the calmness, and the food. We spent 2 days walking around the city, some hours walking back and forth Calle Crisologo, the famous street of old houses and cobblestone steps, watched a local beauty pageant, and visited the public market. In all these times, no one was rushing. I purposefully had to slow down my walking pace. People seemed relax. Store and restaurant staff provided attentive service, without being overly zealous and customer-service-y. No one was running, except for a game of patintero on the street. The only speeding we saw were from bikes participating in a bike race on Sunday afternoon, to which we gamely cheered on, along with residents who waited outside their houses to watch the bikers go by.

Calle Crisologo

The food was something altogether. It's simply not a place for people on a diet. Vigan has lots of local dishes to choose from, six meals in two days were just not enough to sample them all. So, naturally, we resorted to eating two orders of whatever we liked (Irene's Empanada), and ordering main dishes for dessert (bagnet as main in Cafe Leona, then their Napolitan pizza for dessert), finally culminating in hoarding Vigan longanisa in the public market. Of course, there was the last-minute sampling of sinanglaoan soup right before we boarded our bus going back to Manila.

Vigan longanisa, bagnet and sukang Iloko

Irene's Empanada, best eaten when hot and crispy, not for take-out

In every trip, there is a moment that defines the best memory of the city. For me, it was our visit to the Syquia Mansion, the famous mansion-turned museum of the Syquia-Quirino family, and house of former President Elpidio Quirino. Ferdinand, the city-appointed tourist guide, closed the museum doors at the time of our visit, so he can give us a private tour of the place. Later on, we found out that it's common practice among tourist spots here to provide each tourist group with their own private tour guide, whether it's one of the old houses, or up the Bantayan Bell Tower.

Ferdinand knew his history, knew the house, and knew his city. His last bit of information for us: do you not wonder how the city's architecture survived war and destruction that left other cities in ruins? He's right. That is something to wonder about, given that Vigan does not have the usual fort that can be seen surrounding old cities (think Intramuros and Cebu's Fort San Pedro).

These houses are aging gracefully.

Near the end of the Japanese invasion, the Japanese were ordered to burn and destroy all the places they occupied before leaving. Captain Fujiro Takahashi, the Military Commander in Vigan then, asked the help of a priest to take care of his Filipino wife, Adela, and their children. Fr. Kleikamp agreed with the condition that Takahashi and his men leave quietly. The following morning, the Japanese were gone, and Vigan was spared.

Legendary love is everywhere. Helen of Troy, Mark and Cleopatra, Romeo and Juliet, Jack and Rose. To die for the person you love, or to die together, has always been the popular storyline that became a popular definition of what love is. Perhaps this is why Vigan's love story is not that well-known. While our love stories end in destruction, tragedy and tears (it ain't good drama without tears), Adela's and Takahashi's saves a whole city. That's the real stuff legends are made of.

Happy Valentines Day! :D

Kuya Ferdinand did not have time to tell us the complete story, so if you'd like to know more, this article might help.

Define: biology, part 1 - the Scientific Method

While I work in training, my educational background is in Biology. Yes, once upon a time, I was a dedicated scientist who knew how to dissect organisms, identify parasites under the microscope, name corals while walking at the beach, and lure wasps into a test tube while feeding it with honey-water.

Biology is one huge never-ending practice of the Scientific Method. We're constantly in the lab doing whatever kind of experiment of the moment. While it may have the reputation for being a method you can only use in science-related experimentation (I can't be sure, but it may be because of the words "method" and "science" used in the same breath), it's actually grounded on simple tasks of problem-solving, that can be adapted in any and most situations.

For instance, it can act as a guide or workflow when you need to create a new training material.

• Identify the problem. Why is there a need for training? What gaps can be addressed by training?
• Formulate the hypothesis/es. Find out what causes the gaps to understand how to address them.
• Formulate the test predictions. Write the learning outcomes you predict will happen after learners complete the training.
• Review the related literature. What existing materials, references and resources are out there? Sift through these to see what else needs to be developed.
• Design the methodology. Outline the lessons, activities and materials that need to be developed in order for the learning outcomes to be met. Then start crackin' at development.
• Test. As with any system that is born out of design, a course needs to be tested for errors in functionality and accuracy of content. It undergoes rigorous feedback and back and forth testing to make sure it's sound for use.
• Analyse the results. Once the training goes live, and even before it does, constant evaluation is important to make sure it addresses the learning outcomes.
• Make your conclusion. Of course, after everything, you need to conclude something. The difference in scientific experimentation is that after testing, you get to conclude if your hypothesis and predictions are correct or not. In training, the conclusion should be the positive, that the training was able to address the problem. Because if it didn't, maybe you identified the wrong problem in the first place, or maybe it was something that training is not needed for.

So, what does Biology have to do with training? or with office work, for that matter? I get asked that question often, and my answer is always the same: a lot. There's so much that Biology taught me that is beyond memorization of terms, computation of energy and cutting up organisms.

Learning is never really wasted. The secret is recognizing the underlying principles and adapting them to daily life.

This site gives good info on how we used to decide on things without experimentation.

Define: readiness

For school, we answered a survey on online teaching readiness. It's something an institution can administer to teachers before they start teaching distance education or online course programs.

The questions comprise of the usual things: questions on computer usage, technological and multimedia proficiency, willingness to explore. What made this questionnaire different from others I've seen is the addition of a few simple questions that ask about the person's views on online teaching versus other traditional teaching methods, such as lecturing.

The questions are somewhat leading, "do you think that lecture is the best way to teach a person?". It almost tells you, "if you answer NO to this question, please consider another career. Online teaching is not for you."

Though obviously leading and biased, these questions, I think, are probably the most crucial parts of the survey. It's essentially asking the person - do you believe in what we are doing, or at least open to its possibility?

I like looking at school lessons as an analogy or parallel to life lessons. This simple readiness survey taught me one life lesson: in order to be considered ready, it's not enough that you know what you're doing, nor that you have the tools to do it. Being ready is opening your eyes to the possibility of an alternative to what you know, the possibility that something can be done in a different way.

Define: happiness

Yes, what a cliche - define happiness, lolol.

From a school reading assignment: In one online learning case, a teacher had difficulty to give grades because online learning involves a lot of assessing how a student is becoming better compared to him/herself before. In face to face classrooms, it's easy to get away with giving grades based on observing if a student is behind, ahead or just coping with how the rest of the students are performing. In online learning, much of the student's interaction is based on non-stop written correspondences. A teacher gets to see how the student is becoming better as he/she gets more and more feedback.

I was originally going to call this post define: free time. It is my belief that once afforded with free time, the mind wanders off to places that are not healthy - doubt, suspicion, idleness, and so on, as the common saying goes. We live in an age when it's common to be riddled with questions of self-worth, self-actualization, self-respect and all other questions that boil down to "why am I here?" and "who am I?". We live in a time when heartbreak is paraded for all to see, break-ups are common tabloid offerings, and even non-celebrities make their love affair, and the demise of it, known to anyone through social networking media. We post and re post quotes about love, heartbreak, finding the right person, losing the right person, seducing the right person, and everything else that can be done to the right person.

It's so easy to use love, or lack of a love life, as an excuse for raunchy behavior and depressed moments. That's what Sex and the City taught us, right? And all the other TV shows and movies before it. And even all the other classic love stories before it. So, I wonder, this quest of finding and defining happiness through love life, is it  something we believe, or is it because it's what we're trained to do? (question posed a-la Carrie Bradshaw).

Despite the Facebook and Twitter barrage of quotes about finding and not finding love, look around, and you will find, that we don't measure happiness so much based on whether or not a person is with someone. It's defined by how we see our life at the moment. Some people are happy because they have someone. Some people are happy because they are single and free to mingle. Some people are happy because they have kids, some happy because they have careers. Some are happy because they just bought their dream house, some because they are working abroad. Life, after all, is not a case of classroom vs. online learning. We don't have to fall into the trap of using other people's "performance" to measure if we are behind the rest of the pack.

So, I conclude, that the world is actually happy. We just often forget that we are because drama is so addicting and very Hollywood.

Define: project management

Every 3rd week of January, several towns in the Philippines celebrate the feast day of Sto. Niño, Jesus depicted as a child. Among these places, two stand out for me: Cebu City, the original place where the Sto. Niño was brought by Magellan's fleet, and Tondo, one of the oldest cities in the Philippines, and where I grew up.

The Tondo version of the fiesta has notoriety for riot. Wait, that is, Tondo has always had notoriety for riot. People have a notion that it's a place of violence, crude manners and neighbors yelling back and forth. There is some truth in that. I'm not about to debunk those notions.

Consider this, though: The Tondo fiesta has always been a successful town event, despite the place’s reputation for lack of organization and hard-to-manage townspeople. When it comes to planning, we can learn a thing or two from this town event:

1. Project leaders. Barangay captains act as fiesta leaders. The parish priest heads the different committees that plan all the festivities. Once elected or assigned to these posts, these people know no hesitation and no saying no.

2. Timelines. In my toot-something years of observing the town fiesta, the predictability of events is certain: the banderitas always go up the week after New Year's. Concerts and contests are held in the town plaza. A Friday night grand concert takes place. A costume parade happens in the morning of Saturday, followed by a 2-hour long procession in the afternoon. People follow these timelines strictly, without succumbing to common excuse-able barriers like rain or traffic.

The banderitas always go up, no matter what. And they're always pretty!

3. Forecasted resources. Committees are set up in advance to make sure that every mass that happens hourly is manned with readers and ushers, processions are manned with security, and every other event is staffed well.

4. Contingency plans. With these events dependent on a few people who serve as leaders, one would think that the changing mayoral, barangay captain and parish priest posts can cause disruption with how the town fiesta is celebrated each year. But, still, every year, regardless of who's leading it, the fiesta happens according to timeline and tradition.

Of course, I am oversimplifying. For one, the magnitude of tasks involved in hosting a fiesta may not be as big as a setting up a new call center, or starting a new development project. Second, religion plays a big part as to why town fiestas become easy to manage. Fiestas are largely a profession of devotion to a patron saint. Everyone cooperates when they're asked to demonstrate their faith.

There are things within every project that stay the same though, regardless of magnitude and scope. Apart from those listed above, ownership is one basic element. Someone has to be responsible and accountable, for a project to be successful. Someone has to own it and tell the world "I'd like to see this happen." Likewise, people should be able to go to this someone and tell him/her "I have a road block", and be confident that they will get a sound advice on how to tackle it, without adversely affecting the project.

I had wanted to demonstrate this ownership in our household, and help out in the cooking. But my parents have too much ownership, and had the kare-kare and palabok ready even before Saturday was starting. There was nothing else to do but eat. Maybe next year? :)

Define: reciprocation

Jeepney rides, my downtown Manila equivalent of long walks, are good times to think and reflect. There's something about the time spent alone confined in my own "upong siete pesos" space that allows me to brainstorm about things I need to do ("upong siete pesos" is an expression roughly saying that one should only occupy the space paid for in public transports, which in jeepneys is 7PHP, currently.) Naturally, I was thinking about what to write about in my blog, an exercise that I only do at the back of my head when inside the office premises. By the end of the jeepney ride I had several ideas jotted down in the other part of the back of my head, meant for notes.

I had a thank you message from a guest house I stayed at in Cebu last December. I wrote a review about them in Trip Advisor relating our experience with them. The message said that the honest review helped put them back in the competition. Another traveler also liked a review about a restaurant we ate at in the same city. He didn't think the dishes in my photos were appetizing, but he appreciated how the review was written, with information and descriptions.

Yesterday I met with two good friends (make that three, including their son), the brains behind Prodigal Concepts , and shared laughs about the blogosphere clique that we move in at the moment, about the shameless posts and reposts, tweets and retweets, links and promotions we do for each other.

I guess being an active participant online is not just about knowing how to maximize your search engine and find the best deals/travel locations/reviews/movie schedules through the internet. It's also largely about giving back. In order to get content to search from, we need to throw back content out there. Through the back and forth sending of comments, tweets, links and posts, writers and authors can get feedback on their work and improve the material they produce online.

So, while I have a thousand other things I wanted to write about from my jeepney ride, I thought it's best to talk about the importance of giving back first. We post and repost partly because we want to help other active participants remain active, and partly to promote their cause, which in some cases may be difficult to attain, such as buying Meg a Jaguar, but hey dreams can come true, who am I to judge and all that blah blah.

Define: habits

So, the first weekend of my master's program is nearing its end. Here are a few things I learned, aside from the things I really should be learning:

1. Re-establish study habits. The work won't be done in one sitting (sigh), so it's best to allot a few hours each day instead of cramming it up all in one go.

2. Take breaks in between (yey!). As Doc Mine pointed out, neurotransmitters in the brain can only last 2 hours of intensive thinking.

3. Hide the edges of your Rockmelt toolbar. I.e., turn off your virtual personal life during the time you're studying. It's bad enough that you're distracted as it is, it's even worse if you're the one distracting yourself.

4. Find creative ways to take notes. I struggled with this one. I'm used to either keeping notes in a physical notebook in a face to face class, which means I have to type everything after taking notes (redundant effort). If I'm reading off a screen, I take notes using Notepad or OneNote, which means I have to save it in a physical drive. I needed to find a means to carry my notes with me virtually. For this, I found Zoho Notebook. (Ken, an esteemed colleague and chronic blog critic, says this is actually old news.)

In terms of what I'm supposed to be learning, it looks like I am in the right program (thankfully!). No wonder my attempts at taking Psychology never panned out. When taking a course, it's best to choose one that is directly relevant and specific to your interests and current activities. I imagine it would be hard to answer questions when you don't have any experience to draw material from.

(How I answered questions on the relevance of Nitrogen to Leafhopper viral attacks back in college is now a mystery to me lolol.)

The weekend may be ending, but my course work isn't. So, it's time to hit the (e)books once again!...that is after I take a power nap and go to Greenhills (ooops!) :D